介绍:
♬主播：Flora（中国）+Erin（美国）
♬歌曲：I Count on Me
今天我们要聊一个非常有趣并且比较深刻的话题，关于一些看似流行但其实可以被视为toxic (有毒) 的建议。
This isn’t to say all advice is bad(并不是说所有的建议都是不好的), but it’s crucial to recognize when advice doesn’t quite apply to your own situation.
01. “Just be yourself.”做你自己。
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It sounds positive. 但是这句话省略了一个非常重要的premise（前提）that is you’re already self-aware and respectful of others(你建立了自我意识和对他人的尊重).The problem with this advice is that it implies any version of yourself is perfect (任何时候的你自己都是完美的) just as it is.
But personal growth is about identifying areas where we can improve, not just accepting everything at face value (从表面上看). Growth is about learning, progress and transformation (转变) and going beyond yourself. 片面地理解这句话可能会lead you astray (让你误入歧途)。
02. “Show them what they’re missing.” 做出点什么让他们看看。
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This is the idea of proving others wrong by showing them you can succeed. 但是如果你的动力是建立在向别人证明自己的基础上，actually the mindsetcan become toxic.
Live for yourself, guys. If you think their assertions (断言) are ridiculous and toxic, just stay away from them. Not all people are careful with their words(审慎发言), but you don't have to take responsibility for their mistakes.
一种更健康的说法是“Achieve your goals because they matter to you, not as a form of revenge or validation.” Let your accomplishments be something that fulfills you—not something that proves a point(而不是证明观点的东西).
03. “Why are you sad? You have everything to be happy about.”明明有值得高兴的一切，为什么要难过呢？
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Florathinks, to a certain extent, the person who said it is demeaning other people's emotions(贬低别人的情绪). Because no one can fully empathize with someone else(完全感同身受), we never have the right to judge how they really feel.
It implies that external circumstances should control your emotions (意味着外部环境应该控制着你的情绪). 但是情绪并不是这样运作的。This kind of advice can make people feel ashamed of their sadness. But it’s just a natural emotion. So don’t ignore and disrespect your true feelings.
04. “Follow your passion.”跟随你的激情。
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Sounds good, right? But sometimes, this advice can actually be misleading(误导性的).
并不是每个人的热情都与一个stable career（稳定的职业生涯）或他们的技能相一致，这可能会导致很多frustration（挫折）。
Pursuing your interests is great, but sometimes it’s more practical to look for a balance—finding a job that’s fulfilling but also realistic in terms of earning potential and job prospects (收入潜力和工作前景). 梦想和热忱是要有的，但也要建立在生活的基础之上。
“Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.”
[图片] 有些领域是真正接触后才会感受到它的魅力。所以关键就在于你有没有真正踏实去做。
So, rather than blindly following passion, maybe the better advice would be to find purpose in what you do and keep space for personal growth outside of work too(也为工作之外的个人成长留空间).
You might find a mix of stability and interest that actually works better in the long run(把兴趣和稳定性相结合才是长远之计).
05. “Failure is not an option.” 没有失败这个选项。
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没有失败这个选项，也就是只许成功不许失败了。听起来有一种破釜沉舟的决心。
It sounds so determined and tough(坚定而强硬), but if we’re honest, failure is almost always an option—and often the most available one.
A better way to look at it might be, “Failure is likely, but the odds of success increase when you try(失败很有可能，但如果你尝试，成功的几率会增加).”
Flora also has a favorite quote that is very similar to this one: the opposite of success is not failure, it's doing nothing (成功的反面不是失败，而是什么都不做). 总之也是鼓励大家不要惧怕失败，只要尝试就会有成功的可能。
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Accepting failure as part of the process can actually be motivating. When you recognize that success often takes multiple tries(成功往往需要多次尝试), failure just becomes part of the learning curve, not some terrible end.
Knowing this will bring you closer to the truth, rather than being deceived by the lies you create(被自己的谎言欺骗). And that’s a mindset shift that helps. It turns failure into something manageable, rather than something you avoid at all costs(而不是一些你不惜一切代价避免的东西).
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树立自己良好的values（价值观）会让我们更有判断力，不会人云亦云、随波逐流。
Remember, the best guide for your life is your own informed perspective(你自己的知情视角). Thanks for joining today!Until next time, keep thinking, keep questioning.
