介绍:
人们问我，提供一个充满爱的氛围的正确方法是什么？好帮助孩子成长，而不会妨碍到他的自然潜能。
People have asked me, what is the right way to provide a loving atmosphere that can help a child grow without interfering in his natural potentiality.
任何帮助孩子的方法都是错误的。“帮助”这一观念本身并不正确。孩子需要的是你的爱，而不是你的帮助。孩子需要的是滋养、支持，而不是你的帮助。孩子天生的潜力是未知的，所以没办法能帮助他正确的实现自己天生的潜力。当目标是未知的，你就没有办法帮忙；所有你能做的就是不妨碍。事实上，在“帮助“的名义下每个人都在妨碍别人；因为这个名义很好听，没有人会反对。当然孩子很小，他很依赖你，他无法反抗。
Every way to help a child is wrong. The very idea of helping is not right. The child needs your love, not your help. The child needs nourishment, support, but not your help. The natural potential of the child is unknown, so there is no way to help him rightly to attain his natural potential. You cannot help when the goal is unknown; all that you can do is not interfere. And in fact, in the name of “help” everybody is interfering with everybody else; and because the name is beautiful, nobody objects. Of course the child is so small, so dependent on you, he cannot object.
你周围的每个人都跟你一样：他们也是被自己的父母帮助大的，跟你被帮助大的方式一样。他们没有实现自己天生的潜力，你也没有。所有人都错失了，尽管有所有的帮助，来自父母的，来自家庭的，来自亲戚的，来自邻居、老师、牧师的。事实上，每个人都背负着“帮助”的重担，它是如此的沉重，还谈什么实现天生的潜力，一个人甚至连非自然的潜力都实现不了！一个人动都没办法动；每个人肩膀上的重担就跟喜马拉雅山一样沉重。
All the people around are just like you: they have also been helped by their parents, the way you have been helped. Neither they have attained their natural potential, nor have you. The whole world is missing out in spite of all the help from parents, from the family, from relatives, from the neighbors, teachers, priests. In fact everybody is so burdened with help that under its weight, what to say of attaining natural potential, one cannot even attain unnatural potential! One cannot move; the weight on everybody’s shoulders is Himalayan.
你周围的每个人都被帮助过，被大大的帮助过，成了现在的样子。你也被帮助过；现在你也想帮助孩子？所有你能做的就是去爱，去滋养。要温暖，接纳。孩子携带着未知的潜力，没有任何办法可以确定他将来会成为什么。所以也根本不可能建议，“你应该用这种方式来帮助孩子。” 每个孩子都是独一无二的，所以对于每一个孩子根本没有通则。
All the people around you have been helped, greatly helped to be what they are. You have been helped; now you want to help the children, too? All that you can do is to be loving, nourishing. Be warm, be accepting. The child brings an unknown potential, and there is no way to figure out what he is going to be. So there is no possibility to suggest, “In this way you should help the child.” Each child is unique, so there cannot be a general discipline for every child.
正确的方式根本不是去帮助孩子。如果你真有勇气，就请不要帮助孩子。爱他，滋养他。让他做任何他想做的。让他去任何他想去的地方。你的头脑会不停的被诱惑要去干涉，被各种很好的理由。在理论和辩解上头脑非常聪明：“如果你不干涉，可能会有危险；孩子可能会掉进井里，如果你不阻止。” 但是我告诉你，最好让他掉进去，这也强过帮助他、摧毁他。
The right way is not to help the child at all. If you have real courage then please don’t help the child. Love him, nourish him. Let him do what he wants to do. Let him go where he wants to go. Your mind will be tempted again and again to interfere, and with good excuses. The mind is very clever in rationalizing: “If you don’t interfere there may be danger; the child may fall into the well if you don’t stop him.” But I say to you, it is better to let him fall into the well than to help him and destroy him.
孩子掉进井里，这种可能性是极小的——即便掉进去了，也并不意味着会死；可以把他捞出来。如果你真的很担心，你可以把井口盖住；但是不要帮助孩子，不要妨碍。井可以用篱笆围起来，但是不要妨碍孩子。你真正的担心应该放在去除所有的危险，而不是妨碍孩子；让他走他自己的路。
It is a very rare possibility that the child falls into the well—and then too, it does not mean death; he can be taken out. And if you are really so concerned, the well can be covered; but don’t help the child, and don’t interfere. The well can be fenced, but don’t interfere with the child. Your real concern should be to remove all dangers but don’t interfere with the child; let him go on his way.
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