【老友记104】Rachel got her first pay check

Scene 1 Joey: (to Ross) Hey! Here's the birthday boy! Ross, check it out: hockey tickets, Rangers-Penguins, tonight at the Garden, and we're taking you. Chandler: Happy birthday, pal! Joey: We love you, man. (Kisses Ross) Ross: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago. Joey: So? Ross: So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date? Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty." Ross: Oh my God, oh- is today the twentieth, October twentieth? Monica: Oh, I was hoping you wouldn't remember. Ross: Ohhh. Joey: What's wrong with the twentieth? Chandler: Eleven days before Halloween.. all the good costumes are gone? Ross: Today's the day Carol and I first..consummated our physical relationship. (Joey is puzzled.) Sex. ..You know what, I-I'd better pass on the game. I think I'm just gonna go home and think aboutmy ex-wife and her lesbian lover. Joey: The hell with hockey, let's all do that! Chandler: (trying to stop Ross leaving) C'mon, Ross! You, me, Joey, ice, guys' night out, c'mon, whaddya say, big guy, (Pretending to punch him in thestomach.) Huh? Huh? Huh? Joey: C'mon, Ross! Ross: Alright, alright, maybe it'll take my mind off it. Do you promise to buy me a big thumb finger? Chandler: You got it. Scene 2 Rachel: Look-look-look-look-look, my first pay check! Look at the window, there's my name! Hi, me! Phoebe: I remember the day I got my first pay check. There was a cave in in one of the mines, and eight people were killed. Monica: Wow, you worked in a mine? Phoebe: I worked in a Dairy Queen, why? Rachel: God, isn't this exciting? I earned this. I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally—(opensenvelope)—not worth it. Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money? I mean, what- Chandler,look at that. Chandler: (looking) Oh, this is not that bad. Joey: Oh, you're fine, yeah, for a first job. Ross: You can totally, totally live on this. Monica: Yeah, yeah. Ross: Oh, by the way, great service tonight. All: Oh! Yeah! Scene 3 Rachel: What are you guys doing here? Kiki: Well, we were in the city shopping,and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true! Joanne: Look at you in the apron. You look like you're in a play. ……….. Joanne: Alright. Let's talk reality for a second. Rachel: Okay. Joanne: When are you coming home? Rachel: What? Guys, I'm not. Joanne: C'mon, this is us. Rachel: I'm not! This is what I'm doing now. I've got this job- Kiki: Waitressing? Rachel: Okay, I'm not just waitressing.I'm.. I, um... I write the specials on the specials board, and, uh... and I,uh... I take the uh dead flowers out of the vase... Oh, and, um, sometimes Artelle lets me put the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies. Scene 4 Monica: We thought since Phoebe was staying over tonight we'd have kinda like a slumber party thing. We got some trashy magazines, we got cookie dough, we got Twister... (The phone rings and Monica answers it.) Monica: Uh, Rach, it's the Visa card people. Rachel: Oh, God, ask them what they want. Monica: (on phone) Could you please tell me what this is in reference to? (Listens) Yes, hold on. (To Rachel) Um, they say there's been some unusual activity on your account. Rachel: But I haven't used my card in weeks! Monica: That is the unusual activity. Look, they just wanna see if you're okay. Rachel: They wanna know if I'm okay. Okay..they wanna know if I'm okay, okay, let's see. Well, let's see, the FICA guys took all my money, everyone I know is either getting married, or getting promoted, or getting pregnant, and I'm getting coffee! And it's not even for me! So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay, then you can tell them I'm okay,okay? Monica: You should feel great about yourself! You're doing this amazing independence thing! Rachel: Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like, everything. And for what? Phoebe: You are just like Jack. Rachel: ...Jack from downstairs? Phoebe: No, Jack and the Beanstalk. Monica: Ah, the other Jack. Phoebe: Yeah, right! See, he gave up something, but then he got those magic beans. And then he woke up, and there was this, this big plant outside his window, full of possibilities and stuff..And he lived in a village, and you live in the Village.. Rachel: Okay, but Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up a cow, I gave up an orthodontist. Okay, I-I-I know, I know I didn't love him- Phoebe: Oh, see, Jack did love the cow. Rachel: But see, it was a plan. Y'know, it was clear. It was figured out, and now everything's just kinda like... Phoebe: Floopy? Rachel: Yeah. Monica: So what, you're not the only one. I mean, half the time we don't know where we're going. You've just gotta figure at some point it's all gonna come together, and it's just gonna be...un-floopy. Phoebe: Oh, like that's a word. Rachel: Okay, but Monica, what if- what if it doesn't come together? Monica: ...Pheebs? Phoebe: Oh, well... 'cause.... you just...I don't like this question. Rachel: Okay, see, see, you guys, what if we don't get magic beans? I mean, what if all we've got are.. beans?