演讲精选
I turned 12 on the set of my first film, ‘The Professional,” in which I played a young girl who befriends a hit man and hopes to avenge the murder of her family. The character is simultaneously(同时地)discovering and developing her womanhood, her voice and her desire. At that moment in my life, I, too, was discovering my own womanhood, my own desire and my own voice. I was so excited at 13 when the film was released and my work and my art would have a human response. I excitedly opened my first fan-mail to read a rape fantasy that a man had written me. A countdown was started on my local radio station to my 18th birthday, euphemistically(委婉地) the date that I would be legal to sleep with. Movie reviewers talked about my “budding breasts” in reviews.
I understood very quickly even as a 13-year-old, if I were to express myself sexually, that I would feel unsafe, and that men would feel entitled to discuss and objectify my body, to my great discomfort. So I quickly adjusted my behavior. I rejected any role that even had a kissing scene, and talked about that choice deliberately(刻意地) in interviews. I emphasized how bookish I was and how serious I was, and I cultivated an elegant way of dressing. I built a reputation for basically being prudish, conservative, nerdy, serious in an attempt to feel that my body was safe and my voice would be listened to. At 13 years old, the message from our culture was clear to me. I felt the need to cover my body and inhibit my expression and my work in order to send my own message to the world, that I’m someone worthy of safety and respect.