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我摇了摇头。
I shook my head.
不明白穷人怎么会有条件对人仁慈。
I could not see how poor people had the means of being kind.
更不说我还得学他们的言谈举止,同他们一样没有文化,
And then to learn to speak like them, to adopt their manners, to be uneducated,
长大了像有时见到的那种贫苦女人一样,坐在盖茨黑德府茅屋门口,奶孩子或者搓洗衣服。
to grow up like one of the poor women I saw sometimes nursing their children or washing their clothes at the cottage doors of the village of Gateshead.
不,我可没有那样英雄气概,宁愿抛却身份来换取自由。
No, I was not heroic enough to purchase liberty at the price of caste.
“但是你的亲戚就那么穷,都是靠干活过日子的么?”
"But are your relatives so very poor? Are they working people?"
“我说不上来。里德舅妈说,要是我有亲戚,也准是一群要饭的,我可不愿去要饭。”
"I cannot tell. Aunt Reed says if I have any, they must be a beggarly set. I should not like to go a begging."
“你想上学吗?”
"Would you like to go to school?"
我再次沉思起来。我几乎不知道学校是什么样子。
Again I reflected. I scarcely knew what school was.
光听贝茜有时说起过,那个地方,年轻女子带足枷坐着,戴着脊骨矫正板,还非得要十分文雅和规矩才行。
Bessie sometimes spoke of it as a place where young ladies sat in the stocks, wore backboards, and were expected to be exceedingly genteel and precise.
约翰·里德对学校恨之入骨,还大骂教师。不过他的感受不足为凭。
John Reed hated his school, and abused his master, but John Reed’s tastes were no rule for mine.
如果贝茜关于校纪的说法(她来盖茨黑德之前,从她主人家一些年轻小姐那儿收集来的)有些骇人听闻,
And if Bessie ‘s accounts of school-discipline (gathered from the young ladies of a family where she had lived before coming to Gateshead) were somewhat appalling,
那么她细说的关于那些小姐所学得的才艺,我想也同样令人神往。
her details of certain accomplishments attained by these same young ladies were, I thought, equally attractive.
她绘声绘色地谈起了她们制作的风景画和花卉画,
She boasted of beautiful paintings of landscapes and flowers by them executed,
谈起了她们能唱的歌,能弹的曲,
of songs they could sing and pieces they could play,
能编织的钱包,能翻译的法文书,一直谈得我听着听着就为之心动,跃跃欲试。
of purses they could net, of French books they could translate, till my spirit was moved to emulation as I listened.
更何况上学也是彻底变换环境。
Besides, school would be a complete change.
更何况上学也是彻底变换环境,意味着一次远行,意味着同盖茨黑德完全决裂,意味着踏上新的生活旅程。
It implied a long journey, an entire separation from Gateshead, an entrance into a new life.
“我真的愿意去上学,”这是我三思之后轻声说出的结论。
"I should indeed like to go to school," was the audible conclusion of my musings.
“唉,唉,谁知道会发生什么呢?”劳埃德先生立起身来说。
"Well, well! who knows what may happen?" said Mr. Lloyd, as he got up.
“这孩子应当换换空气,换换地方,”他自言自语地补充说,“神经不很好。”
"The child ought to have change of air and scene," he added, speaking to himself. "Nerves not in a good state."
这时,贝茜回来了,同时听得见砂石路上响起了滚滚而来的马车声。
Bessie now returned. At the same moment the carriage was heard rolling up the gravel-walk.
“是你们太太吗,保姆?”劳埃德先生问道。
"Is that your mistress, nurse?" asked Mr. Lloyd.
“走之前我得跟她谈一谈。”
"I should like to speak to her before I go."
贝茜请他进早餐室,并且领了路。
Bessie invited him to walk into the breakfast-room, and led the way out.