离婚也“限号”

Lincoln: Now, you may need a little bit of luck during the divorce in Shanghai. Wu You, what exactly is going on down there? WY: In China, if a couple wants to have a divorce, they need to go to the local marriage registration office to apply and sign a divorce certificate to untie the legal marriage relationship. But here in Shanghai this time, the marriage registration office has announced new changes on the process. There has been a little lottery. You need to… Lincoln: Hang on, hang on now. There’s a lottery for when you can get divorced? WY: OK, so in the past – we can compare this – before this, there has been 70 couples come to apply for the divorce in one day, this has happened, and now they only accept about 50 couples maximum, for one day’s divorce applications, so that means they have deducted [the] applications maximum. Lincoln: OK. I’m still a little bit confused. WY: They need to bid for the chance to successfully apply for that divorce certificate, so it’s not that big [a] lottery, it’s just like you need to be [in] the 50 out of 70 couples, or you might wait longer, but it doesn’t mean that they stop you from getting that certificate. Michael: I think it’s a bit disingenuous to call it a lottery. I mean, you still have a five in seven chance of getting it, you still have a better chance of getting it than not. Lincoln: What do you make of that, Wu You? WY: I think you guys’ comments are totally understandable, but here in China, we have an old saying. As it goes: “It is OK if you want to destroy ten bridges, but never separate one couple”. [Lincoln: OK] So we value marriage a lot, and here, nowadays, in the modern society, maybe someone rushed into the decision of getting a divorce. In the past, there was no marriage counseling, this kind of business. People are just considering it as a domestic case. They would not want to talk about it, they would not want to go to some experts for counseling. I think they might need a little bit of help, but they’re so shy to ask. I think this is a nice intention from the bureau, but maybe there should have been more business or helping hand in China. Lincoln: There’s also been an idea that maybe – the divorce, maybe you could bring it down or maybe you could amend it somewhat [with] the idea of having a seven-year expiration date. If you don’t want to stay married after about seven years, you have to renew it. WY: Oh, talking about that, imagine if, instead of saying “until death do us part” during the wedding vow, the bride may also say in the future: “I will take you to be my lawfully wedded husband, but only for seven years.” So at the end of 2015 last year, someone in Shanghai has come under fire by net users for proposing that Chinese marriage certificates should start having a seven-year expiration date. Lincoln: What do you make of that, Michael? Michael: It sounds like a contract, doesn’t it? So when the seven years elapses you choose to either renew the contract, presumably for another seven years, or go your separate ways. I think that’s maybe a little bit of an excessively pragmatic way of dealing with what’s supposed to be a loving union of man and wife for the rest of their lives. Lincoln: If two people, after seven years, realize that they don’t want to go further, maybe they would have found out five, six, seven years later? That’s looking at it as a failure. Maybe after six years you decide, “well, my goals are different, we’re different people, let’s just go our separate ways.” Michael: The notion of a seven-year stretch hanging over you all the time? Lincoln: Well, if you view it as a stretch, then it’s a little bit different. Michael: No, if after six years it’s not working out and you’re not compatible and you have different interests and you want to go your separate ways, then I think that’s all well and good. I don’t think having a seven-year contract, as it were, is really going to help. That’s basically admitting that it’s doomed to failure from the outset. Lincoln: No, you see, it’s not a get-out, ends after seven years. You have the option of renewing it. There’s no reason you have to. It opens up a different avenue, potentially. Michael: The happiest administrative procedure of your life. Lincoln: Yeah, although I know the seven years is very arbitrary, though, which is the one thing I would say. Why not make it three years? Why not make it five years? So the seven years is a very arbitrary number, for me, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad idea. I think most people are quite romantic at heart, and having a contract that says seven years, I think most people would reject that.