介绍:
Chapter 3 Weird People
In the lunchroom I got to sit next to Ryan and Michael. I gave my apple to Ryan, and he gave me his yogurt with sprinkles in it.
“Ms. Hannah is weird,” I said.
“Artists are always weird,” Ryan said. “My mom has a friend who’s an artist, and she’s really weird. My mom says that’s because artists are creative.”
“Your mom is weird,” Michael said.
“Lots of people are weird,” I told them.
“That doesn’t make them creative. Some people are just weird, and they’re not creative at all. And some people are creative, and they’re not at all weird.”
“You’re weird, A.J.,” Ryan said.
“Anybody who wears a dress made of pot holders is weird,” Michael said.
“Art teachers are supposed to dress funny,” I said.
“If my dad dressed like that, he’d be fired,” Ryan said.
“Your dad is a businessman,” Michael told Ryan. “He has to wear a tie around his neck every day. It doesn’t do anything. It’s just a piece of cloth that hangs around his neck. If you ask me, that’s pretty weird.”
“Yeah,” I said, “which is weirder, wearing a dress made out of pot holders, or wearing a piece of cloth around your neck for no reason at all?”
“They’re both weird,” Ryan said.
“All grown-ups are weird, especially art teachers,” said Michael.
“Ms. Hannah is weird, even for an art teacher,” I said. I noticed that Andrea and Emily at the next table were listening to us. I knew they were listening because they kept shaking their heads and rolling their eyes and snickering at us.
“Maybe Ms. Hannah isn’t really an art teacher at all,” I said, just loud enough so the girls would hear it. “Did you ever think about that? Maybe she’s just pre- tending to be an art teacher.”
“Yeah!” Michael said. “Maybe Ms. Hannah is a thief, and she’s trying to steal all our garbage and take over the world. Stuff like that happens in comic books all the time.”
“Maybe our real art teacher was kidnapped, and she’s tied up to a chair in the teachers’ lounge,” Ryan said.
“And the teachers are shooting BB guns at her,” I added.
“We’ve got to save her!” Emily suddenly said. There were tears running down her cheeks. Then she got up and went running out of the room.
Me and Ryan and Michael laughed our heads off. That Emily is such a crybaby.
“You boys are weird,” Andrea said.
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