第213期：《男孩杰的动物园》——你可曾品尝生命的野性

想成为我们的主播，欢迎加微信 xdfbook 投稿。 一段美文，一首英文歌，或是一点生活感想，全由你做主。 《男孩杰的动物园》——你可曾品尝生命的野性 Jamrach’s Menagerie The Sun himself came down and walked on earth. … This cat was the size of a small horse, solid, massively chested, rippling ) powerfully about the shoulders. He was gold, and the pattern painted so carefully all over him, so utterly perfect, was the blackest black in the world. His paws were the size of footstools ), his chest snow white. I’d seen him somewhere, his picture in a poster in London Street, over the river. He was jumping through a ring of fire and his mouth was open. A mythical beast. I have no recall of one foot in front of the other , cobblestones ) under my feet. He drew me like honey draws a wasp ). I had no fear. I came before the godly indifference of his face and looked into his clear yellow eyes. His nose was a slope of downy ) gold, his nostrils pink and moist as a pup’s. He raised his thick, white dotted lips and smiled, and his whiskers ) bloomed. I became aware of my heart somewhere too high up, beating as if it was a little fist trying to get out. Nothing in the world could have prevented me from lifting my hand and stroking ) the broad warm nap ) of his nose. Even now I feel how beautiful that touch was. Nothing had ever been so soft and clean. A ripple ran through his right shoulder as he raised his paw—bigger than my head—and lazily knocked me off my feet ). It was like being felled ) by a cushion. I hit the ground but was not much hurt, only winded ), and after that it was a dream. There was, I remember, much screaming and shouting, but from a distance, as if I was sinking underwater. The world turned upside down and went by me in a bright stream, the ground moved under me, my hair hung in my eyes. There was a kind of joy in me, I do know that—and nothing that could go by the name of fear, only a wildness. I was in his jaws ). His breath burned the back of my neck. My bare toes trailed ), hurting distantly. I could see his feet, tawny ) orange with white toes, pacing the ground away, gentle as feathers. I remember swimming up through wild waters, the howling of a million shells , endless, timeless confusion. I was no one. No name. Nowhere. Then came a point where I realised I was nothing and that was the end of the nothing and the beginning of fear. I never had a lostness like that before, though many more were to come in my life. Voices came, pipping ) in from the howling, making no sense. Then words— he’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead, oh, lord mercy—and the hardness of stone, cold beneath my cheek, sudden. A woman’s voice. A hand on my head. No no no his eyes are open, look, he’s … there, fine boy, let me feel … no no no you’re all fine … he’s dead he’s dead he’s dead … there you come, son … here you come … And I am born. Wide awake sitting up on the pavement, blinking ) at the shock of the real. A man with a big red face and cropped ) yellow hair had me by the shoulders. He was staring into my eyes, saying over and over again: “There you’re a fine boy now … there, you’re a fine boy …” I sneezed and got a round of applause. The man grinned. I became aware of a huge mob ), all bobbing ) their heads to see me. … “Now,” said the big man, taking my chin in his fist and turning my face to look at him, “how many fingers, boy?” He had an accent of some kind, sharp ) and foreign. His other hand he held up before me, the thumb and small finger bent down. “Three,” I said. This brought another great murmur of approval from the crowd. “Good boy, good boy!” the man said, as if I’d done something very clever, setting me on my feet but still holding me by the shoulders. “Fine now?” he asked, shaking me gently. “Very fine, brave boy. Good boy! Fine boy! Best Boy!” 太阳自己落了下来，在地面上走着。 …… 这只大猫有一匹小马那么大，身体壮实、胸膛厚实，肩膀周围的毛发一起一伏。它是金色的，浑身的斑纹都描画得十分讲究，完美极了，那斑纹是世界上最深的黑色。它的爪子有脚凳那么大，胸脯雪白。 我在哪里见过它，泰晤士河那边伦敦街的一张海报上有它的画像，它正张着嘴跳越一个火圈，像一只神兽。 我想不起自己是怎么踩着鹅卵石步伐从容地走向它的。它就像蜂蜜吸引着黄蜂一样地吸引着我。我一点也不害怕。我走到它面前，盯着它那双清澈的黄眼睛，它脸上有种神圣的冷漠，鼻子是一个毛茸茸的金色斜坡，粉红色的鼻孔湿漉漉的，像小狗的鼻孔。它努了努带着白点的厚厚嘴唇笑了，胡须也跟着张开了。 我这才意识到自己的心在哪儿高高地悬着，就像一个想要冲出来的小拳头似的在跳动。 当时什么东西都无法阻止我抬起手去抚摸它鼻子上那一片温暖的绒毛。即使是现在，我还能感觉到那一次的抚摸是多么的美妙。我从来没有摸过如此柔软、干净的东西。当它抬起比我的脑袋还要大的一只爪子时，它右肩的毛发一阵起伏。它懒洋洋地就把我击倒在地，那感觉就像是我被一个软垫击倒了似的。我摔在地上，但不怎么疼，只是喘不上气来，之后发生的事情就像是一场梦了。 我记得自己听到了无数尖叫声和大喊声，不过是从远远的地方传来的，仿佛我正在水里下沉。世界翻了个个儿，像一条明亮的小河从我身旁流过，我身子下面的地面在移动，我的头发挂在眼睛里。我感觉到一种快乐，这点我是知道的——完全没有能称之为恐惧的感觉，只有一种野性的感觉。我在它的嘴里，它呼出的热气让我感觉后颈火辣辣的。我光着的脚趾拖在地上，隐隐作痛。我能看见它黄橙色的脚和白色的脚趾，它踱步走开了，脚步轻盈得像羽毛一般。 我记得自己冲过汹涌的水往上游，耳朵里是数不清的贝壳的呼号声，脑袋里是无穷无尽、无休无止的混乱。我谁都不是，我没有名字，也不知身在何方。然后有那么一个时刻，我意识到自己什么都不是，而那一刻就是这种无知无觉状态的终结，也是恐惧的开始。我此前从未像这样迷失过，虽然在后来的人生中我又像这样迷失过许多次。有人声传来，穿透贝壳的呼号声而来，但不知道在说什么。过了一会儿，有人说话—— 他死了，他死了，他死了，哦，主你发发慈悲吧——突然，有什么冰凉的东西放在了我的脸颊下面，像石头那么硬。 这是一个女人的声音。 一只手放在我的头上。 不，不，不，他的眼睛睁开了，看，他……你瞧，好孩子，让我摸摸……不，不，不，你很好…… 他死了，他死了，他死了…… 你醒了，孩子…… 你醒了…… 我就这样重生了。我直直地坐在人行道上，完全醒过来了，对现实世界中人们的震惊感到惊讶。 一个红脸、黄色短发的大脸盘男人托着我的肩膀，他正注视着我的眼睛，一遍又一遍地说：“好了，你现在没事了……好了，你没事了……” 我打了个喷嚏，获得了一阵掌声。那个男人咧着嘴笑了。我开始意识到有一大群人都在探头探脑地看我。 …… “好了，”那个高大的男人用拳头托着我的下巴，把我的脸转向他，“这是几个手指，孩子？”他的腔调有点亲切、清脆而且有外国口音。他在我面前举起另一只手，拇指和小拇指弯曲着。 “三个。”我答道。 引得人群中又响起一阵表示赞许的低语声。 “好孩子，好孩子！”那个男人说，好像我做了什么特别了不起的事儿一样。他扶我站起来，但仍旧揽着我的肩膀。“现在觉得好些了吗？”他问道，轻轻地摇了摇我。“很好，勇敢的孩子。好孩子！棒孩子！你是最棒的孩子！” 文章摘自：《新东方英语·中学生》杂志2017年4月号